Lust at First Sight

While most people are thrilled with the idea of love at first sight, I am not. In fact, I do not believe in it.  Physical attraction or what I like to refer to as “lust” can exist instantly at first encounter. Love on the other hand, takes time to fully develop. Oftentimes, lust is confused with love. So how do we distinguish the two exactly? Well here’s a hint. Love is when you want to be with him/ her, while lust is when you want to be on top of him/her – or under, as the case may be *wink. In most scenarios, lust eventually fires up love as the relationship progresses, or vice versa.

 Lust, same through with love is a powerful feeling. One must not underestimate what one can do to satisfy his lust. Sometimes, it could be deadly. Though lust and love are inherent in human, we are also endowed with the power of discretion or “freewill”. Whether or not to act on these emotions is NOT beyond our power to control. For this reason, one must not shield behind “tao lang ako” (I’m only human) as an excuse for giving in to his emotion. Our emotion is our own responsibility.

Now let us focus on LUST and its role in maintaining a long lasting relationship. Lust is important because it is what makes a relationship romantic. It is essential in the expression of intimacy. In other words, it is what distinguishes a romantic/intimate relationship from other types of love and/or forms of relationships. For instance, a man’s love towards a woman absent lust is called “brotherly/friendly love.” But the moment this love is coupled with lust; it ceases to be brotherly and becomes something else (romantic). Hence, it is essential that lust and love co-exist. A relationship without lust is not at all romantic; and a relationship without love is nothing but an abandoned boat floating in the ocean - without direction, or if you are familiar with Air supply’s “Making Love Out of Nothing at All”. It is love AND lust that make a couple LOVERS, not merely friends. 

        While lust is undeniably strong; its strength is diminished by the passing of time. In effect, a relationship based solely on lust falls apart once the flesh is satisfied. It is therefore essential to determine whether your interest towards someone is driven by lust OR love. So before you commit the mistake of breaking someone else’s heart or wasting both of your time by investing in a relationship founded on lust, ask yourself, “Do I love her because she is attractive or she is attractive because I love her?”